How do I become a better daughter?
Hey, I'm 16 and I don't know what to do anymore. Today is Christmas Eve and we (my parents and I) all cooked together and the presents were already under the tree. Then a small argument broke out and my mum went upstairs and my dad yelled at me for being such a bad daughter. Then my mum came back at some point and my parents yelled at me for two hours and Christmas is cancelled. (The food that we never ate is still on the table, by the way.) My question now is how can I become a better daughter so that I'm no longer such a disappointment to my parents.
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Were you guilty of fighting with your mother? If that’s what you could have said differently. Sometimes it’s good not to say anything whether you’re right or not. The remaining course seems to be more a problem for your parents. I find very inappropriate that they have been so upset, this Christmas will always be remembered as a sad Christmas.
Yes, what should we answer.
We need to talk to your parents first and listen to their views, we don’t know you either. You can say a lot here.
Thought…Trust your guts: If something sounds too incredible or unrealistic, it may be advisable to look more closely.
@ Then a cool fight broke out and my mother is up and my father yelled at me because I was such a bad daughter.
You’ll be silent about what the trigger was, your father won’t have reacted like that!
Certainly, she is actually a very good daughter and only overcrowded claims are placed on them.
Well, all speculations. We can’t make a judgment on both parties.. Here it is called “Remaining and examining facts”
You basically doubt the question.
@ You basically doubt the question.
No, I’m just realistic, you can’t express your opinion by just listening to one page! Everything else would not be fair. Who says she’s really not a good daughter? Is she Faul? Does she just think about herself? Does she have a party in her head? Does she respect her parents? Neither I nor You can say that. You always have to listen to second pages. So you can’t say anything. In addition, she does not give an INFOS on prehistory, think about it. No one is evil on his own flesh and blood, it must always have happened before what it does not reveal.
That’s what I could ask you, you seem to believe all and everyone, something of neutrality, or isn’t it in your vocabulary?
Tip: You can always listen to two opinions and only then you can judge. To take the blue party is missing here.
Has the TE written so => Why doubt? More so
yes I
You have a very clear attitude, you don’t believe the FSin.
You represent a fundamentally positive attitude to parents, ‘ meat and blood’.
Obviously you have more ideology than experience.
You were there? Scream for 120 minutes… so I have a neck pain.
Good idea. 2 hours screaming has a certain indication effect, especially since it was obviously not a single case.
Your father’s behavior is impossible! As an adult, he’s bringing such sayings and is making you verbally? The question should not be how you become a better daughter, but how he becomes a father, who also deals with such situations.
Does a dispute, whether on Christmas or on another day, have to escalate so that it comes out? Your parents are yelling at you for two hours? Something’s not going round!
You’re a teen with 16. They are often “bad” at the age. So what? Especially in time, parents should let five be straight and if they are overwhelmed or don’t know how to deal with it, get help! Perhaps you should have given them an educational counselor for Christmas ;-)?
Your parents should be disappointed. And you don’t think you’re a bad daughter. Whatever the trigger was, there’s something out of a little fight.
Learn to be more relaxed about your parents, pay more attention to your sound in the future, try to support them in the household, then you don’t have anything to blame!
With such a question, I feel that unfortunately hardly anyone can be a quick help.
Let’s analyze what happened:
You were screamed for over 2 hours. That was a decision of your parents to do this. After you ask this question here, you did not know what to change from the cry. Consequently, it could be that the problem is not about you, but only about your parents.
Theoretically, you could try to behave like the only adults in the room: An adult just remains calm and tries to continue with the normal daily routine despite the problems of others. This is perhaps too difficult for 16 years.
In addition, people of this kind can be taken off in general or in problematic situations (do not cook together), but with parents, this is not an ideal solution.
Don’t misunderstand me, it’s not an attack on you: The Youth Office probably uses a social-pedagogical family aid when they get wind.
It would be good to know why the quarrel broke out
You’re in puberty. Your brain doesn’t work properly. Parents should know that. You are therefore, for the most part, not liable. But the problem is that as parents you can’t stand it. That’s it. Well, if your brain goes up again, just run away and join your room for a quarter of an hour. It’s usually better.
Must write what has happened, or you have done,
Autonomy and independence.
You indicated SVV and Esstör in your answers. Often it is about an area that the affected people are hiding for themselves, in which they experience their autonomy. Your question here also shows the limitation problem.
Did you do a therapy? Have you done family rherapie together?