How can you evaluate this new poem?
Hello! I've written a new, melancholic poem called "The Path to the Stars." How would you rate this poem? Does it sound serious and beautiful, or does it sound funny and flawed? What is your opinion? If you have a negative opinion, feel free to write it. Thank you.
The night is silent, so beautiful and anxious,
the stars shine white.
The way to you is too long,
completely airless and completely quiet.
A small worm crawls into the ground,
He knows exactly his goal.
There are periods in life,
if he wants the body.
(1 votes)
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It starts well – but the last two lines are nonsense.
The night is quiet, so beautiful and bang,
the stars shine white.
To you is the way very long,
all airless and whole hot.
A small worm crawls into the ground,
he knows exactly his goal.
He has his methods
if he wants to see the body.
“There are periods in life when he wants the body.”
Just because soil and periods are reimbursed doesn’t sound useful.
But of course it’s your poem and your decision.