What do you think of the text?

I ran. I ran as fast as I could, but they were getting closer.

Build sense, then it looks less like a dry description. In such scenes, of course, not too much, otherwise the pace is too slow, but instead “but they always came closer” e.g. “But the steps were always louder” or “despite that, I could almost feel/listen/etc her breath in my neck.” In any case, incorporate sensations of character.

And: “show not tell” is a very well-known phrase that says exactly that. For example, not “he was afraid” writing, but describing what one notices. Does he breathe faster? Does he sweat? Etc.

I knew if I stopped now they’d get me and kill me.

Come on, please. Otherwise, here you can improve a lot again. Something like “I knew” I rather avoid, as a personal narrator you can write the thoughts directly on. “My lungs burned every breath, but I couldn’t stand. If I stopped now, they’d catch me. And what would happen then – probably that would be my end.” Or something.

“I can’t!” I cried out desperately.

Why does the character scream? Would you scream in the situation? I think there are more thoughts here.

I’m on the floor.

Fiel. And here again, writing something more doesn’t hurt. “My vision was vanishing when sweat ran into my eyes. My foot jumped against a stone, and although I had already been in the shrub, I could not catch myself this time. When I slipped onto the cold ground, I became aware it was over. I had lost.”

At once they stood over me, their dark hoods pulled over the face, and the black swords raised to kill me.

I think it’s better to find the sentence, but “at once they stood above me.” What does the character realize, does he see the shadows of the people falling on the ground? Or their silhouettes and how they stand out from heaven?

But then she should wake up for this, I would take the sentence: then I opened my eyes. I should write the first part in a prologue and the second then in the first chapter or both together in the first chapter.

You can choose how to divide this and how long your chapters should be completely left to you. But I would build a greater separation between both, for example Prolog and Chapter, as you write it.

And: That was a lot of criticism, but even the best authors started with such a little or much worse written stories. This is part of learning, so I also think it’s good that you get the opinions of outsiders. Don’t be discouraged 🙂