Why don't my parents support me in anything?
Hi everyone, I have a problem. My parents don't care about my childhood/youth. I'm not allowed to play in any clubs. I've tried capoeira and didn't want to, but my parents forced me because it was in front of our house. I tried boxing, but they took me out because I was never allowed to go, and I recently got type 1 diabetes. Now I wanted to act in a theater group, but my parents won't let me go. Now I'm really enthusiastic about fitness, I want to take powder and things like that like my friends, or pills which aren't harmful at all. Now they're telling me that I'm going to die because of this stuff. I'm never allowed to have any social contact, apart from school. They always let me go home and just say I'm gaming or studying. I have enough gaming planned and want to do my own thing outside and make friends outside of school, but they won't let me. What should I do? We are financially very well off, but they won't let me go by bike or bus, only by car or not at all.
(4 votes)
Loading...
You should ask yourself what your parents' financial situation is like. A gym membership costs almost 50 euros a month, maybe even more, depending on where you live in Germany. And when you talk about those pills and powders, they cost a lot of money too. Just for comparison…
Isopure Low Carb, vitamin C and zinc to support the immune system, this is one of the few that is suitable for diabetics.
The can costs
It's even more expensive at mail-order pharmacies. These are the bulk packs. Small packs cost between 30 and 50 euros, and single packs cost around 5-10 euros.
As you can see, it's not that easy, since it's so expensive. If you want to exercise, you can do it on your own. There are videos of exercises on YouTube, and you can maybe go to the Calestenetics studio. It's free.
No, my parents have a company and have a lot of money, so much that these contributions would never be a problem
And that's exactly the problem. You're operating under the motto: my parents have a company = lots of money = they can and must therefore fulfill all my wishes, no matter the cost.
Just because you have a company doesn't mean you automatically have a lot of money – and even if you have enough money, you don't have to throw everything at your child.
Sprich mit ihnen.
was den?
Über dein Problem?!?
If you then list below everything you were allowed to try, then I wouldn't sign it like that…
The time factor can play a big role here. For example, some mothers complain about their children playing in soccer clubs. They have to train once or twice during the week, and almost every weekend they have to drive the kids to some kind of soccer tournament. That takes up a HUGE amount of time—free time for us adults, too.
So you were allowed to try something out anyway. And they probably forced you to do it in the beginning, since you probably really wanted it beforehand and they invested money in it. You should at least finish the course.
And why were you never allowed to go there? Was it too far away? So your parents had to drive you there once or twice a week? Or were you not allowed to go because of your bad grades?
Your parents are more than just your taxi drivers. They have jobs to do, households to run, and they do drive their children somewhere now and then—but not all the time. My daughter is allowed to go dancing once on Friday—I take her there because I don't work that late on Fridays. During the week, it's not possible anyway because of school and my work. She's home at 3:30 p.m. and then she still has to study. Dinner is at 6 p.m., and then it's off to bed (she's even younger). There wouldn't be enough time for any classes anyway.
But you're definitely not 7 anymore—can't you take the bus? By bike? Do you have friends from boxing who could give you a ride?
First Caopoera, then boxing, then acting, now the gym – you change your hobbies like other people change their underwear – no wonder your parents aren't keen on paying you for anything anymore and don't want to take you anywhere anymore.
You're also taking supplements on your own—and that's certainly harmful. Too much of certain nutrients is also bad for your body—if you want to take something like that, only consult a doctor.
It doesn't happen immediately – but if you take too much of something over a long period of time, you could definitely die from the overdose at some point.
Maybe look for other friends —- because the no-contact rule probably applies because of your friends who are persuading you to take pills. I wouldn't want my child to meet up with them either.
Yes, but the thing is, I'm not allowed to go by bike or bus etc. Either they drive me or not at all.
and the reason for this is? If you know the reason, you can do something about it
Maybe they want you to concentrate on school during the week. Then it might be a good idea if you arrange something for the weekend that you can go to on your own. Before that, though, you can still study and help out around the house—then you'll take the wind out of your parents' sails.
Ja vielleicht sind deine Eltern kontrollfreaks
ne die kontrollieren meine handy nie
Na siehst du ist doch gar nicht so schlimm und sie lassen dich ja überhaupt was machen. Meine Eltern kontrolliern mein Handy. Schreiben mir vor was ich essen soll, was ich anziehen soll und wann ich duschen darf. Alles
Are you 14 (different question) or 16 (profile), but that doesn't change my answer much.
What would you do if you simply didn't stick to it, if you simply took away the freedom that others have?
Inform them that you are with a friend or outside, so they don't have to worry. You can also do this over the phone if you think it would be difficult to confront them face to face.
You wrote in another question that you have an older brother. How does he deal with that?
Do similarly strict rules apply to him, how old is he?
How is he dealing with this? You should be able to support each other. Talk to each other about wanting to change something. You have to stick together.
Er ist 30 meine eltern waren nie zu ihm streng als er jung war ka warum meine elten würden mich niemals bei nh freund lassen
Does he still live nearby? Can and are you allowed to visit him?
Can you talk to him about it and get him to talk to your parents about it?
I understand that you're not allowed to go to a friend's house. But your parents aren't allowed to forbid you from doing something like that. At least not in general. Something like, "You have an important paper tomorrow and you still have to study, so they're not allowed to go today."
So what would happen if you simply wrote to your parents that you were going to a friend's house in the afternoon, would come home around 7 p.m., then turn off your phone and stay away until 7 p.m.
Of course there would be trouble, but maybe it's worth enduring the trouble for a few months.