What can I do about homesickness?
I live in a group home. Since around the summer holidays, I've been banned from having any contact with my parents (officially because my mother is negatively influencing my development; unofficially because they want to put pressure on my parents to agree to medical treatment that neither they nor I want, and that isn't absolutely necessary). My mother is also sticking to this. She doesn't want to harm me.
Sometimes I miss her so badly that I can physically feel it. I feel sick and get headaches. It's usually fine during the day, but in the evenings it gets really, really bad. Sometimes I cry because I'm so homesick.
I don't know how long I can endure this. I sometimes see my dad secretly, and he replies to messages, etc. But unfortunately, my mother is completely obeying the no-contact rule. Sometimes I feel like a 6-year-old child because I can't stand being without my mother. But right now, it's really like this, and I'm really desperate.
(2 votes)
Loading...
Talk to the responsible persons in the group of homes who are supposed to organize a conversation with the doctor and your parents and talk about this medical treatment again. Do not cooperate with the Youth Office only brings disadvantages to your parents. There must be a reason why this treatment is considered necessary.
My parents are cooperating. The doctor thinks it is the decision of me or my parents
If your parents agree, it’s a bit difficult. I’d try to talk to your parents and ask if you can go home. And tell them how you feel that you miss her and you don’t feel good there…
And do you know why your parents agreed to it? Is it just because of the medical because of it can’t be that you put them under pressure. Villt, you should talk to your parents about taking a lawyer.
If you don’t have any money to do this, you can make an application for a fee at the local court but then the lawyer knows how to do it, then you don’t pay for it.
I hope I could help you.
So I can’t talk to my mom with my parents because she’s sticking to the contact ban. But thank you for this very well thought out post XD
You know, if you don’t say what it’s about, and you’re going to answer so stupid, you won’t find any answers here.
Well, then not, there will be reasons why your mother’s keeping to the plan. Apparently it’s necessary.
But you mean your dad sometimes answers you and you see him secretly?! Otherwise write a letter
I told you what it is.
You have contacts where you live. Talk to them. Let’s explain why what’s going on and why is it now. Once you understand why how to trade, you can also find acceptance.
Alternatively, you listen and try to communicate.
I don’t know your case – and you don’t have to go into detail here either. But I assume that those who take care of you now know what they do. You can trust yourself.
I know exactly why they want me to have no contact with my parents. That’s perfect
I can’t judge that. But I know that you have adult people around you who know how to deal with life.
If they don’t get to know your mood, nothing can change. Since these people are now your closest vetra, you should also trust them!
No, you didn’t convince me or I’d agree. Sorry the conversation with you seems more than pointless. Either you really don’t understand me or you don’t want to understand me. Both make me crazy, so I’ll mute you now
But you’ve already argued – haven’t you? And then you were convinced. And then you didn’t say anything. So accepted. – Or how?
This is absolutely not the best
Then make sure that the current situation is the best for you. You should have recognized that now.
Again, I understand. This is not the problem
Say you want to understand everything. Find the conversation. Time and again! Ask all your questions until you finally understand everything.
They know how I feel.
I know very little about the problems between the youth office and your mother, of course, but the ban on contact with the person concerned is a very far-reaching measure, and so easily without a family court also not possible.
I would advise you to contact you with an independent ombut office which, according to §9a SGB VIII, must exist in each federal state and are the right contact person for conflicts with the youth office or the institution of the measure.
The prohibition of contact can already be a “injuriousness to the mind” because you suffer massively from it.
The whole is not a judicial measure but only a recommendation from the educators. My parents stay on it (here my mother as my father)
but you suffer from it and that is certainly not the purpose of the measure.
Oh. I realize that’s not right. This is simply not the point. As long as my mother sticks to it, I can’t change anything.
If you don’t mind, don’t do that. This is what professionals want to be in the field of pedagogy and organize something with you – with the few facts I can only say: completely incomprehensible. Before contact lock comes thematic ban for certain content and if this does not work accompanied contact. A ban on contact is such a massive intervention and it is not comprehensible to me.
Of course it’s the point. If I don’t suffer, they couldn’t blackmail me/my parents.
Then say that, you can also conduct conversations under supervision, just if you feel so bad.
I haven’t tried that many times. But that would destroy the plan of the educators. They have no more pressure medium. So, of course, they don’t allow that.
That’s so mean, huh?
What kind of plan? If that’s a lie with that bad thing, maybe you could turn to the jugendamt.
Then talk to a doctor about it.
Why are you in the group and why are your parents not allowed to have contact with you?
Who led this in the way?
Thank you. How helpful. I know
The plan is to build pressure on
So the plan is this treatment?
What a plan is on the question.
Lol, what is the question?!
If it doesn’t work, it won’t work.
Then you have to go through there.
Or you’re talking to the youth office.
Lol what should a doctor do? XD
This has different reasons.
Why I can’t have contact is the question. This has led the educators into the way