Was tun bei abscheu zum Autofahren?
Also, ich bin bin letztes Jahr 18 geworden, meine Mutter hat mich im Sommer dazu gezwungen mit dem Führerschein anzufangen. Nach 2 Fehlgeschlagenen Theorie antritten, welche beide sie ausgemacht hat, hat sie nur noch gemäkert, jedes mal wenn irgendwer mit L17 oder so nur in der Nähe war ging es: “siehst du, jeder Depp schafft das, bist du so dumm?”. Das ganze ging 8 Monate, in der Zwischenzeit habe ich Schule gehabt und konnte nicht nebenbei Führershein machen. In den Sommerferien habe ich dann final die Theorie (geteilt) bestanden. Ich habe dann bis Oktober Fahrstunden gehabt und Praxis geschafft. (Ich muss gestehen das ich noch nie wriklich auf der Autobahn gefahren bin)
Ich muss aber gestehen das ich das Autofahren nicht leiden kann, ich verstehe die “Freiheit” oder was auch immer als positiv dabei empfunden wird. Das Problem am ganzen ist, das meine Freundin in der Zwischenzeit den Führershein gemacht hat,damit sie etwas mit mir unternehmen kann oder man gemeinsam irgendow hinfahren kann, aber ich bin was das Thema überhaupt nur im geringsten angeht nicht mehr ansprechbar. Sie fährt gerne und hat Spaß daran, ich kann das leider nicht einmal im entferntesten verstehen. Wir haben darüber einmal geredet, wo ich ihr gesagt habe das ich nichts über das Fahren wissen will (Das sie bestanden hat weiß ich auch nur, weil ich es über meine Eltern erfahren musste) und auch nícht mit ihr fahren will. Sie hat geweint, weil sie sich gefreut hat, ihren Führersehin zu haben und etwas unternehmen zu können. Ich konnte mich nicht einfühlen, nicht anders reagieren, sie nicht trösten.
Das ganze ist jetzt so geendet, das sie meinte: “Ich kann mit meinen Freunden darüber reden, aber niemals mit dir. Ich werde wahrscheinlich mit dir nie einen Urlaub machen können, weil du so bist.”
Ich will eigentlich positiver reagieren, weiß aber nicht wie. Außerdem muss ich auch bald die nächste Ausbildungsphase machen (Perfektiopnsfahrt und so), aber will nicht fahren oder irgendetwas anderes mit Autos zu tun haben.
Meine Freundin meinte das sie hofft das wenn ich mal fahre ich vielleicht meine Einstelluing ändere, aber sie glaubt das ich potentiell schon so festgefahren bin, das es für mich nicht mehr geht.
Gibt es irgendeinen Weg das ganze hinter mir zu lassen?
If you don’t want to drive yourself, you don’t have to drive. But not even driving in a car is as good as impossible for life. That’s why you should ask why you have such a dislike to cars. Maybe a therapy could help get that under control.
I’m insecure where it comes from, but I’ve already thought of it, it’s hard if the parents were my psychologists, and I’m just deppat. I was sent to the theoretical part of the steering authority to develop a “learning plan”. In the end, it was about my trauma, but I had no chance to go to my psychologist ever since. So I have to sort this out myself.
You’re 18. You can take care of yourself going to a psychologist if you want to work on it.
Anyway, if you don’t want to talk to her about it.
You mention a psychologist in the comments. Is basically a topic for therapy.
I found it interesting
Do you actually generally feel like someone’s driving, or just your girlfriend? Aren’t you driving in cars anymore?
And if no, why is that different with her? Deviations are interesting. Sometimes they lead to answers.
You can also make holiday by train and bus. It’s not that dramatic. But yes, it makes things complicated. Especially if you don’t live in a city with a good public system.
You say in a comment that this comes through the trauma of the driving school. Traumata are negotiable, but that exceeds what this platform can afford. I advise working in cooperation with your therapist to have at least one booth where you can talk about it and go with your partner.
I avoid it as well as it is, my friend does not make an exception.
She lives outside a city in Germany, so I am in Vienna.
The whole thing has already gone through my head, but it must be that my parents are absolutely uncooperative and I cannot afford it as a student (without pocket money). The school psychologist I’ve been with isn’t allowed to do therapy. That’s why I’ve got to handle this all alone.
Yes 😕 when you live in Germany, the bus service is usually bad and the car is important for mobility.
Are there no cash benefits in Austria? In Germany, this simply pays the health insurance.
I don’t understand how to drive a car. I am sorry that no understanding of you has:(
It’s nice that your girlfriend made the driver’s license, but she had false ideas. Yet she exaggerates. She likes to drive. She blames you. She reacts wrong.
Yes, it was stupid that you didn’t feel happy for her, but business and vacation should still work. She can finally drive. And you can pay the bill. What’s the point? She should be on you.
I’m opposed, I don’t feel comfortable in cars anymore, it’s always the same. I am, unfortunately, broken to such an extent that it is always unpleasant for me, even if all is not rational. That means I don’t want to measure. She doesn’t want me to do that either. She doesn’t want me to do that either.
That is, of course, difficult. Vll can eventually overcome this feeling. I still find it wrong to make the accusations.
During the warm time at least excursions with the bike went. However, it would be good to find such a compromise.
I hope it can be overcome because I don’t want to be like that. I understand the accusations and I have no objection to it.
Then just leave it. Tell your mother and report to the driving school.
Maybe you change your mind when you get older.
I’ve finished the PRACTICAL, I’m missing the perfection rides, so I’m no longer “actually “announced”. And the relationship between my parents and me would not allow that.
Then why do you ask? Then you will probably have to bite in the acid apple and learn diligently – there are learning programs – and repeat the exam.
I was just hoping to be honest that there is someone (even if this is quite special) who had something similar. You don’t know me is clear to me, but the hope was still there.
Try to find a way with your psychologist. What are we doing here? We don’t know you.
I passed exams. the thing is more the car and that driving this vehicle for me is absolute taboo theme, as I described in the 2-5 paragraph.
How are you?
If at least you could have been happy for your girlfriend, she can’t do anything.
I’m not happy myself, I tried to be, but I just can’t. I’m traumatized by the driver’s license, that’s what my psychologist meant to me. That I couldn’t be happy about it made me so finished myself that I cried at night.