Mother is ungrateful?
Hey Community,
I invited my parents and my boyfriend to a restaurant for Christmas.
I've been arguing with my mother since I was a teenager, and my father always gets in the way. Since I got a boyfriend, the arguments have become more frequent because my mother can't cope with the separation from me.
My relationship with my mother is bad, with my father it's good, but our family doesn't exist. We don't do anything together, so my attempt was to invite her over.
However, my mother is not happy with my boyfriend because he is my friend.
I will also be moving out in the new year because I am 21 and have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years.
Anyway, back to the topic. I've been arguing with my mom for the past week and again today. She keeps saying she's not bringing food and I should go alone (I don't understand how she can always be so ungrateful). I was so looking forward to the meal, but now the fun is gone. I was also worried because she doesn't have a good opinion of my boyfriend.
I wanted to give it another chance, but she says "you don't care about our family," even though I'm the one trying to hold everything together.
(2 votes)
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If she says she doesn’t come, take her by the word and serve a table for three.
This is also a bit stupid, but also totally rude of her, if you want to invite everyone to just hit this in the wind.
You can still give her the chance and ask if you should actually just book a table for three people. So she really doesn’t want to come.
Good evening, I’m so sorry.
I wouldn’t cancel the appointment anyway, and I’d definitely go to dinner. I’m sure your mum just said it this way to break down her frustration and still go along. And if not, then your good will was there and you tried. Then you can still go with Dad and your friend.
Wait.
Find it great as you try to keep the “family ” together.
Beautiful Christmas and LG
Of course! If she doesn’t want to, that’s her problem, and she’d probably just mess you up the evening, so the food enjoys third.
Then tell her to stay at home and go with your friend and your father alone. The biggest problem are these compelling attempts to keep everything together, because it’s just being appreciated in the rarest cases, and you’re in the end still the stupid one that has torn up the ass for nothing. Close peace only works when both parties are interested in it, and I think it is more than obvious that your mother has no interest in it. Leave her. She’ll realize how this is when you’re pulled out and the contact gets less and less, she’s driven you to a distance and she’ll realize that at some point. Sometimes this is the only way to learn from his behavior. Through pain.
Thank you, the situation is inconceivable hard for me as I still love her, but I have to
That’s exactly what your mother’s goal is… She wants it to be hard for you. Get out of their game.
I know, but that sounds so brutal: that’s not your fight. You’re not the problem, you’re trying to find solutions. Your mother must realize what she’s doing with her behavior. And that’ll be clear to her at the latest when you’re gone. You’re gonna be much harder than you.
Sure you’re going to eat, you’re saving a table for 4 people.
Who comes is welcome.
If she doesn’t apologize nicely to the waiter: Sorry a person has become ill, we are only 3 people.
He’ll clean up a deck.
Stay calm and confident and enjoy the evening.
If your mother wants to fuck out, it’s her problem alone, don’t make it to yours.
If she doesn’t want, she doesn’t want to. You can’t do anything.
Ask your father if he’s coming with you without your mother, you’re going to need your friend alone.
But please don’t say it, show your mother clearly that you don’t change any of your plans for her rummaul.