Kann man diese Person verstehen?
Es geht um einen Verwandten aus der Familie.
Er hat seinen Wohnsitz mit seiner jetzigen Freundin in Polen , beide kommen jedoch zeitweise zum Arbeiten nach Deutschland.
Beide arbeiten legal als Altenbetreuer und sind separat bei Familien tätig. 24-Stunden-Anwesenheit , Wäsche waschen , spazieren gehen , Tabletten geben und das noch mit bis zu 5 Stunden Pause pro Tag.
Der Vertrag von meinem Verwandten läuft noch 2 Wochen , dann fährt er über Weihnachten nach Polen , kommt aber am 31. wieder zurück zu der Familie , um seinen neuen Vertrag ( wieder 4 Wochen Arbeit ) nachzugehen.
Jetzt ist es so , dass er den Job “Altenbetreuer” als langfristige Überbrückung sieht , bis er seinen Traumjob in Deutschland findet. Er spricht perfekt Deutsch ( mit Akzent ) und will in die Branche Webdesign / IT.
Er hat bereits viel Erfahrung mit WordPress / Webseiten gestalten / SEO etc. als Freelancer / Selbständiger gemacht , allerdings noch nie in einer Firma gearbeitet.
Vor über 10 Jahren lebte er in Deutschland , arbeitete in vielen Firmen , ging dann zurück nach Polen und machte sich mit seinem Webdesign selbständig , bis es nach Corona nicht mehr gut lief. Seit 2 Jahren ist er Altenbetreuer bei Familien in Deutschland und hat dort auch gute Bewertungen. Sein Gehalt liegt im Schnitt immer zwischen 1.900 und 2.000 € Netto im Monat.
Er ist allerdings jetzt nicht gut auf seine Situation zu sprechen , da er zwar Bewerbungen schreibt , aber viele Absagen bekommt. Sein Traumjob ist nicht sein jetziger Job als Altenbetreuer , sondern wiegesagt etwas mit Webseitengestaltung in einer Firma ( fester Job ).
Er lobt immer Deutschland und die beruflichen Möglichkeiten , Verdienst und ihm gefällt gegenüber Polen das Leben hier eindeutig mehr.
Ab und zu schwankt er und wechselt dann immer seine Meinung und das ist mein großes Problem mit ihm.
Z.B. ist er erst selbstbewusst und positiv überzeugt von seinem Können , kurze Zeit später will er mit keinem reden , zieht sich zurück und ist wütend , z.B. auf Absagen der Firmen.
Erst sagt er : Egal , es kommen noch viele Stellen , ich bewerbe mich weiter , abwarten… Und kurze Zeit später behauptet er nicht schlau genug zu sein.
Erst sagt er z.B. : Ihm reichen auch 1.700 € Netto zum Leben in Deutschland , dann sagt er , dass er über 2.000 € für angemessen hält.
Kurz : Mir geht es um seine ständig wechselnde Meinung , die innerhalb kurzer Zeit anders ist. Mal so , mal anders. Heute morgen sagt er A , abends B , ihr wisst was ich meine.
Ist seine Reaktion , Meinungsänderung ( ständiges Hin und Her ) oder sein Frust nachvollziehbar ?
Was würdet ihr in seiner Situation tun ?
Wärt ihr an seiner Stelle genauso unzufrieden oder skeptisch wie er ?
Wie soll ich damit umgehen ? Weil er war immer wie ein Bruder für mich , aber mittlerweile nervt dieses ständige Wechseln seiner Meinung.
(1 votes)
Loading...
Website design is not really IT, but a fashion profession with too many providers.
He would have to consider what a strong demand actually exists for – and then learn and gain experience.
I can understand that very well. So pretty much everything from the text. He is unsatisfied with the current situation, is looking for something new, but is not 100% safe. Even if he’s grown. And then he has good days where he sees the future more motivated, and then he has worse days when he has self-doubt, perhaps because of the failure.
The only thing I don’t understand is your problem. So what’s bothering you that he’s insecure with his future plans? That’s it. And why is this burdening your friendship? Confirm him when he’s motivated and build him up when he sees everything black again. I don’t see a problem. And if it bothers you so much inside, tell him you don’t want to talk about this issue. Or let him talk and put on “passion” until you talk about something else.
I think his behavior is completely normal. What doesn’t mean it’s different. There are also many people who work their whole life in a company and find it great. Unless it’s your own business. So I couldn’t do that, and I’ve done everything. Also because I liked the change and did not make the same for 30 years. Except you have a very varied job.
First he writes that everything is going and then he is dissatisfied with himself and the world and temporarily breaks contact with me. Then I insult him because he only said so, and a few minutes later, and it comes to the fight.
Why are you insulting your “friend” who was “like a brother” for you because he is uncertain? I have several brothers. I’d never feel like they’d be insulting me for something like this or upsetting me or fighting. Why?
Because he can’t change his mind regularly. Once he says Germany is better, sometimes Poland and that change. Weekly always different
Easy to pack half CV
In short, your relative doesn’t know what he wants and what he needs
But he goes to the 40. He has tried a lot in life, from camps, McDonalds, office jobs, factory, web design, to old-age care. Is that normal when you’re still as free as he is?
* I have to write everything because otherwise stupid / general answers come which I myself already have. I need people who get into him and into his situation (so the details) and give me a helpful answer.
I honestly think you’re making too many thoughts about it. Understand that it can be exhausting for the environment if someone doesn’t know what he wants and there are more disputes. But I don’t think you can do much but offer support if you want to take that on you. If you don’t distance yourself from it.
Yeah, that’s hard to talk about if you can’t admit it yourself. Unfortunately, you can’t do much. As I said, it must come from him. I’m sorry I can’t help anymore.
I already told him that he could have ADHD, depression, Borderline or any disorder or something happened at that time. He only writes that I’m supposed to be distracted and that’s not supposed to talk to him. He then writes that everyone should disappear from his life. If you’re lucky, then a few days/weeks later everything is good and he calmed down. But respond to illnesses, then he pauses. I know some stories of him: His childhood was not so good (his father was very arrogant to him) , he came to the wrong path (deception and debt) and was also playful/automatic. He still pays debts today and the gambling addiction he has overcome 100% that I and others can confirm. Thank God he does not drink alcohol and does not smoke.
Maybe therapy is something for him. He tries to find something in countless jobs, which he obviously does not succeed. Maybe it’s just trying to solve a deeper problem. But for that he himself has to come up with something that is not okay if he is told from the outside he has to go to therapy that is not good in most cases.
Well, he doesn’t understand motivation. If something doesn’t fit him, all the others are the guilty. Written earlier with his girlfriend, she meant the same thing that he would calm down again, but at the moment everyone is stupid for him. That is why his changes in opinion.
Maybe he has adhs. Knowing people who want to try this and try out new ones and want to try out new jobs and hobbies all the time, said the goals often change. It may also be that he may see dissatisfied is everywhere he has so far applauded and is simply looking for what his life happiness gives him.