Is it understandable that I'm angry?
Hello
First of all sorry that the text will be so long
It all started last night when I asked my father if he could bring me something from the bakery for this morning (he was there anyway). Once again, he didn't.
Then I realized he'd be out for lunch today, so I asked him to bring the date from the bakery this time. Again, that didn't happen. Then he said I'd bring it back this evening . Guess who didn't have anything with him again. (In the meantime, I stole some of my parents' food because I was starving.)
Then I politely asked him what was so difficult about simply bringing me something from the bakery (especially since I'm only 14). He just yelled at me.
Then I went upstairs, wanted to go to my room, and all I saw was my mother rummaging through my drawers. Of all things, the drawer where I keep all my memories of my horse. And then she yelled at me, asking how I was thinking storing so much "trash" (that's part of his tail, because I still have to figure out how to use it, and it was his halter). She also didn't want to understand that to me, that's anything but trash.
Then she looked at my room and yelled at me some more about how it looked—and yes, it really does look a bit ugly, but what can I do? I'm sick and haven't even been able to walk all day!—and that I have to clean it immediately tomorrow.
Then she yelled at me that if I didn't clean properly tomorrow, she would pour water all over my puzzle (again, remembering my horse)…
Afterwards I had to listen to people telling me how stupid I was and blaming me for things I didn't do!
I tried to stay calm through everything, didn't even raise my voice, but I still stood my ground.
I've also tried many times to get her to talk to a neutral person to get the whole "family" back on track. I've been yelled at several times and banned from the stable for one or two days.
Is it understandable that I'm angry about all this and just want to move out?
I have to admit, I briefly wished that one of her three SMVs had worked out… (But I don't think that way anymore, I just want to get out of here.)
(6 votes)
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Yes, I can understand that. Several boundaries were crossed:
You were promised something that wasn't kept.
Your privacy has been violated.
You were yelled at, which is not okay at all.
You were even threatened. (Destruction of your puzzle)
If you absolutely cannot talk to your parents, I would actually advise you to involve someone you trust.
I've tried exactly that several times, and at some point we always got to the point where we all (my parents, my sister, an independent person and I) should have a conversation, but my parents were always against it and never agreed to such a conversation.
Recently, a friend of my father (aka the owner of my shared care) agreed to attend the meeting and texted my mother about it. My mother then insulted her via WhatsApp.
To the bakery. Your father has a thousand things on his mind. Things like this just slip through the cracks. Send him a WhatsApp reminder.
Your life doesn't depend on a Danish or a pepper pretzel. You could have eaten something regardless of whether Dad brought anything.
It's not about the tail and halter. It's about the fact that you haven't processed and aren't able to come to terms with the grief over your horse. It's all about the dead horse.
Your room didn't become so dirty overnight. It doesn't look that way because you're sick today.
Wow. Speechless. Especially when we read your victim mentality here every day.
I've done it. Several times.
Nope, because the only thing that comes into the house is what someone says they're going to eat. And since they didn't buy anything for me, it became difficult. Sure, there were frozen foods and sweets, but that's really not a decent base for eating on an empty stomach.
How can you process something if they never give you time for it?
Ja, ich verstehe, dass du da raus willst. Deine Privatsphäre wird missachtet und du wirst angebrüllt.
Mit 14 kannst Du noch nicht für Dich sorgen, was Dir ja selber klar ist. Also wäre mein Rat, dass Du einfach mal richtig Ordnung machst in Deinem Zimmer, so dass es nichts mehr zu meckern gibt für Deine Mutter.
Müsste doch möglich sein, oder?
Manche Mütter finden immer etwas. Und dass sie in den Schubladen des FS herumgewühlt hat, geht garnicht.
Es ist hier relativ ordentlich, aber dass halt mal eine offene Taschentücher Packung aufm Bett liegt wenn man krank ist sollte ja wohl klar sein, oder nicht?
Oder dass die Kaninchen mal etwas Stroh aus ihren Toiletten Rausbuddeln und ich da nicht im Sekunden Takt hinterher kehren kann
wenn es unerträglich ist, dann musst Du den Mut haben Dich ans Jugendamt zu wenden und um einen Platz für betreutes Wohnen bitten.
Du könntest dich nach einer wohngruppe erkundigen beim Jugendamt
Puh da scheint ja der Haussegen sehr im Argen zu liegen bei euch? Wie lange geht das schon so
Das geht jetzt seit meine älteste Schwester 18 ist so, also 4½ Jahre
Lebt deine Schwester noch zu Hause? Wie alt bist ? Was für ein Verhältnis habt ihr Geschwister zu einander bzw wie ist das von deiner Schwester zu deinen Eltern
Klar kannst du machen
Darf ich dir mal eine Nachricht schreiben? Vielleicht muss man das hier nicht alles öffentlich posten
Naja, emotionale Erpressung ja, ich weiß auch dass sie meine zweitälteste Schwester vor Jahren mal geschlagen hat, aber sonst nichts
Puh das ist echt eine sehr verfahrene Kiste. Gibt es psychische oder physische Gewalt bei euch
Meinte hassen uns. (Beim dritten Absatz erste Zeile)
Ne, sie lebt nicht mehr Zuhause, sie ist via Jugendamt mit 17 ausgezogen, genau wie meine andere Schwester (wir sind zu viert).
Bin 14
Wir Geschwister außen und eigentlich alle. Bzw mich hassen alle weil ich auch sage wenn mir etwas nicht passt
Heutzutage ist das Verhältnis zwischen meiner ältesten Schwester und meiner Mutter wieder okay. Das von meiner zweitältesten und meiner Mutter abgebrochen (diese Schwester ist heutzutage 19). Und das zwischen meiner 3. Schwester und meiner Mutter genauso wie bei mir