Do I have an eating disorder or disordered eating behavior?

I, a 16-year-old girl (162cm), grew up a bit overweight and started eating less when I was around 11-12. I lost weight from 54kg to 47-48kg in about a year. I didn't really know what I was doing. Until I started counting calories and taking 11,000 steps a day. I still do the 11,000 steps to this day. If I don't manage it one day, I change my date the next day and do them. I can't or don't want to imagine life without this routine. Calories are a bit more complicated because I'm constantly changing my plan, at least until now. I used to only eat packaged stuff because it said how many calories it contains (1200kcal a day). Then I only ate protein, around 500-1000kcal a day. Then I just wanted to eat two meals a day without snacks, with a maximum of 500kcal per meal. At some point I ended up on ED TikTok where I learned a lot about anorexia. I wanted to be the same because I could never really stick to my plans and so I never really lost any weight, actually gaining weight during the big binge phases. But on ED TikTok everyone only ate very small meals and I wanted that too. I started not eating anything one day, but the next day I ate everything. I gained weight because of that, up to 56 kg. But I was sure that if I just pretended to have anorexia and watched or listened to enough music and films about anorexia, I would develop an eating disorder of some kind. I also threw up about four times, but only with a lot of effort. Sometimes I just chewed my food and didn't swallow it, and so on. Every birthday I swore to myself that I would have reached my goal by the next. But because that didn't make my weight go down, I switched to eating 1200 kcal a day. I felt great when I managed it for the first three days and it continued. For the last three weeks I've been managing it at an average level (around 1300 kcal on average). I mainly eat packaged foods like ready-made mashed potatoes. When my family cooks something I have to estimate. I try to work it out as accurately as possible by adding up the ingredients etc., but in the end I track around 700 kcal. That means I'm pretty flexible and eat basically anything as long as it fits into my calorie allowance. Of course I'm still really nervous when my family cooks because I simply don't want to eat so many calories so early in the day. If I eat breakfast or something like that early in the morning I feel really guilty because then I have less available for the rest of the day. But now I don't feel good anymore because I want to eat less to feel better, but I know that if I go down on the calories I won't be able to keep it up and will start binging again. I tell ChatGBT all my eating problems and he says it's also about the control I get that way. The more I think about it the more I believe it because I see counting calories as a bit of my safe space. I enjoy calculating how many calories I need to eat a day to get back to 48kg by January. But ChatGBT, on the one hand I have an eating disorder but when he told me yesterday that I only have 20-30% of it I was depressed and super sad. I spent my time on ED TikTok until 1am. I want to have one somehow so I can get diagnosed. So I'm taken seriously.