Hello, I am 18 years old and will soon be 19 and still live with my mother.
At the moment I only get about €260 in BAB, of which my mother collects €210 as rent (housing, food, electricity, etc.). Can I then ask my mother to give me money to look after my siblings?
(2 votes)
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Excuse me, if you look after your siblings at times is family support. The money you have to spend is really not enough to pay for what you use and consume.
Yes, but I have to do it all the time
What’s always for you?
it is not about strange children, but about siblings. You know them and you can assess them. You can always do something, but you’re only to blame if you’ve acted negligently. If the parents are transferred to a minor, by the way, the parents are owed.
For example, I would never do. If anything happens, she’s the one responsible for watching grarde.
not necessarily, but it can.
She doesn’t have more money to pay more. Help in the household does not necessarily mean playing babysitter.
She lives at home, so she pays money to live there. However, a sum that does not cover the actual costs. And no matter whether she pays money or not, help in the household must make children, is even in the law. And if this help is that you look after siblings, that’s okay. Sure, it needs a frame in which it’s still okay, so I ask what’s always meant. If that means that she is responsible for the siblings every day from 13-22 hours, then that is not okay.
What can she do for having siblings? She pays money for nich home life and if she does not spend a free babysitter
Yes, of course you can ask. You don’t have to play babysitter for free
Depending on the situation of life, this can make her life a bit more unpleasant.
with 18 she can throw the mother out. If she is still in the first training, the mother would still be subject to maintenance – if it is financially available for her. If not then there is no money. Even if she gets one, she’ll have to work next to the training so that she gets halfway through the rounds.
even if the mother doesn’t throw her out, she can make her life very uncomfortable. Yes with 18 she cannot command her to take care of the siblings. But because of house law, she still has some rights. There is, for example, no entitlement to a separate children’s room, no entitlement to a TV/PC, it can impose arbitrary rules – e.g. that all under 30 years of age are not allowed to take a mobile phone into the house (the use must not forbid it, but because of the domestic law, it can determine which objects are allowed to enter the house and which are not)
These are all, of course, extreme examples, but in some cases the situation also excalates.
Therefore, it is very important for the individual case whether it is profitable to go to confrontation course.
‘Cause what about her is often looking after siblings.’ Every day several hours? or 2x a week for 2-3h?
Why does she have to watch? Because her mother simply has to work 40h because otherwise the money is not enough and the care facilities simply do not have so many hours open? then it would be a matter of course if she took care of the siblings every day for a few hours.
But should they be careful every day because the mother simply wants to have “time for himself” – then that would be a good reason to risk a dispute.
The mother can only throw her out if she can get herself. With the siblings, the mother would have had to think about it before. Either she’s looking for a funeral, a babysitter or the kids can stay alone for a few hours. My mother had no big siblings available as a free babysitter and at 96% my parents took care of me when it was absolutely necessary.
Didn’t look in here for a while, and I had to watch 2 hours a day, but now there was such a fight that she throws me out while I was still looking for training and as soon as I had one anyway.
as I said – a discussion here is not meaningful because simply about the backgrounds in the family and also about the extent of watching the information is missing
And whoever she goes to school or does an education,then it takes a lot of time to use underwater recreation she also needs.
At the age, most have their own life and there are eternal babysitter obligations that do not fit.
My parents have really taken care of me so much although my father has always worked 40 hours to a year exception. Almost every year, he had to work away for 3 months and could not go home for a few days/partly almost a week. My mother used to work at least 20 hours. My parents have worked almost always only alternately and as a result have seen little and my mother has financed a house with her salary and us 2 alone and all this without forced babysitting
That’s not true. from 18 the mother can throw them out at any time. She is only obliged to give her a bar service. From the bar service + child money + evt Bafög you can only unfortunately live partially hard. Therefore, a small side job will probably be necessary.
in life is not everything as planned. we just don’t know the background story. the physical father of my husband, for example, just ran away and since he never had a money, he didn’t pay any maintenance. His mother had to finance the two children alone, and that was only by going to work 40h. As a big brother, he always had to take care of the six years younger brother. He certainly didn’t.
And I’m sure his mother has thought about it before – but the best consideration does nothing if unforeseen things happen.
My care facility has so short opening hours that I could not even work 40h purely in terms of time. There’s another 14 weeks of vacation – I have 5 weeks of vacation. If I put all the children in any holiday camps for 9 weeks – what money should I pay?
You can pay a babysitter from time to time – but if the money is short, it won’t be inside. Above all, it would be nonsens to pay a babysitter if he was a ERWACHSENER in the house.
And depending on the age of the children, they can’t stay at home for a few hours.
I did. But my parents stayed with me and my mother was still a housewife. Nowadays, there are not many families who can afford it when only one goes to work.
and even only 96% of the time your parents took care of you – so your parents also had support (and if it was really only 4%, I dare to doubt that works when the mother is housewife).
And as said above, we do not know the background history
for money, alone, etc., it would be natural for me as an adult to help my mother.
Is the reason that she wants to have free time is different. I help if I want and have time – otherwise she has had bad luck