Gedicht durchlesen?

Habe heute mein erstes Gedicht geschrieben, würde mich über Kritik freuen 🙂

My heart in your hands

When I’m with you
My soul is at ease
Allowing my inner child to get through

A simple caress
As gentle as the moon
Makes my insecurities regress

Letting me feel protected
Like a candlelight from wind and weather
Never leaving me neglected

I’m sure we’ll both endeavour
Pushing every boundary
You and I always forever

(2 votes)
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earnest
2 years ago

Great!

Something’s bothering me.

  • to get through: I find in this context

Greeting, earnest

Pfiati
2 years ago
Reply to  earnest

Yeah, I would have said “break through”. But “get through” i. O.

Servus.

earnest
2 years ago
Reply to  Pfiati

“Break through” would have been my choice.

earnest
2 years ago
Reply to  earnest

Thanks for the star!

And continue to trust your talent!

Pfiati
2 years ago

The poem is so or so…

Pfiati
2 years ago

Maybe “less” instead of “regress”.

Nice poem.