Findet ihr Abtreibung sollte verboten werden?

I’m quite aware of it, and I think it’s funny that many want a child on the one hand (sometimes so much that they prefer to forbid abortions, so that more children are available for adoption)

So I didn’t see anyone here trying to ban abortion so there were more children for an adoption. I don’t know anyone who thinks so. Especially since it is unrealistic. If we were to ban abortions, there would be no more children. The only thing that would increase would be the number of illegal abortions. I’m sure most of the women who let a child run off don’t like it.

on the other hand they are not willing to help children who really need help and a loving family.

What’s funny? I thought you knew there was a difference between a nursing child and an adoptive child?

You sound like people are selfish because they want to adopt, but don’t want a nursing child. This is wrong – they simply know that they are not suitable for a nursing child.

I’ve told you before. Didn’t you read everything? A nursing child brings other challenges than an adoptive child. Not everyone feels suitable to receive a nursing child. A nursing child can already be a teenager who has experienced a lot and was in various nursing families. As I said, there are other challenges. It’s not about the willingness, it’s about whether you are able to trust yourself at all.

Once a (selt) comparison: someone wants to be a marathon runner. At the sports club in its place, however, there is only the possibility to learn 100 meters of hurdle. In both sports one runs – nevertheless there are great differences. So should this person try to get rid of hurdle runners, or rather try to become a marathon runner?

How much bigger would the burden have been if the child had no care family you get had it?

I never said foster families were wrong. They are good and important. But people have to be ready for it. It doesn’t matter if a couple takes up a nursing child, although they really want an adoptive child.

What do you mean “too old”?

In the case of an adoption, there is no official age limit in Germany, which the respective youth office decides. But most people take about 40 as an upper limit.

If someone applies 36 for an adoption and then has to wait 4-5 years, then this person will also be older. And at some point, keep too old for an adoption.

Then these couples should apply for a permanent staff, as nursing parents become Hand rings sought, and the hurdles are significantly lower (legal parents do not necessarily have to agree, for example, in contrast to the adoption) or they should be open even for older or not very healthy children, because they often find no place.

However, a nursing child and an adoptive child are still a difference, even in permanent care. In the case of a nursing child, one does not have the exclusive right of custody; it can be that it remains with the paternal parents, or with the youth office. A nursing child also retains the name of his family.

If the family of origin does not have German citizenship, but has another, then it also has the nursing child. This can be a problem if you want to leave abroad with the nursing child.

And it is quite possible that the paternal parents may continue to be treated with the child.

I know a nursing child who was with a family for permanent care. The nurses wanted to adopt them, and the child wanted it too (she was already in puberty). Only the paternal mother stood across. For the nursing child, the nursing mother was her mother while she only called the paternal mother when it came to a visit. But she didn’t like it, for the child it was a big burden.

https://www.gewuenschtestes-willkind.de/2023/05/pflegekind-aufnahme-alls-zur-uebernahme-ein-dauerpflegschaft-als-pflegefamilie.html

That’s way too flat! This is true for healthy babies, but not for disabled or sick babies, although for those who are even looking for a supra-regional. For toddlers whose mothers have found only after a few years that they are overwhelmed or even older children who have lost their parents, for example, and have no relatives.

funny, when my wife and I were applying for an adopted child a few years ago, we were asked if we were willing to accept a child with disabilities. We have confirmed that we would include both a child with physical disability and a child with Trisomie 21 (so Down Syndrome). Nevertheless, in the period of several years the Youth Office could not give us a child (and before you ask: yes, we passed the review, we were allowed for adoption).

There are hardly any extra-adoptions in children over 3 years.

Yes, in Germany, generally only infants are adopted, older children come in nursing families.

So much quark in an answer…

Of course they don’t exist. Because women who brought a baby to the world usually build a natural bond to their child. Therefore, there are so few babies released for adoption.

There are enough women who do not build a bond to the child who see it as a foreign body, especially if the child was not planned.

The reason why so few children are released: the social support for mothers has become better than just a few decades ago. Some mothers used to have no choice but to give their child, especially when they were young and alone. Nowadays, these mothers receive more support and they can keep their child.

And you want to ban abortions now…

Where did I say I wanted to ban abortions? I’m against a ban.

Maybe you should inform yourself first before you spread more wrong things.

Are you sure about that?

Yeah, I’m sure. There are couples waiting for a child for several years, but don’t get one because none is released. These couples could also adopt a child from another county, which would be possible without difficulty. But in the other counties it is the same: there are many applicants, but no children that can be adopted.

I have been dealing with this issue for 7 years and have already spoken with several youth offices in Germany.