Extreme fear of failure after buying a horse?
Hello,
Since yesterday, I've become the owner of a wonderful horse. Great character, very well-behaved, top gaits—wonderful sums it up perfectly.
Financially, everything's working out, and timing is also working out. Especially since he's in an open stable and can survive a day without exercise 😀
But I'm currently experiencing such extreme fear of failure. I'm sitting here crying like a baby, thinking I'll never get it all done, that I'm neglecting him, that he won't be happy with me, and that I'm ruining this horse…
I have experience with horses, and I had a very good feeling about him. We both clicked immediately.
And yet I'm still afraid that it won't work out and that I'll hurt him. Maybe precisely because I think he's so great and only want the very best for him.
Did you have that too? How did you overcome it?
best regards
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If you keep going, you won't do him well! And I don't say that to "release" you, but to shake you up.
So: Get up, brush your nose, continue, and never put yourself in such a hole again! Your horse does not need a perfect owner, but a balanced being that gives him safety through his friendly, consistent being. And when it actually begins to jam somewhere, it is ready to see and work on it. And he doesn't care to use the help of others when they are stuck alone.
Well, it's a horse – no God! So stop putting it on a podium and treat it like a horse, then you're sure you won't hurt him. Whether and how it works with you shows the time, and yes, it takes to make you a team. With one pair of horse riders more of them, with the other less – is ok. It doesn't come to speed here. Gear h positive & relaxed to the cause, get help & support if you notice you won't get clear/not further.
No reason to put you under pressure, really not. And if it really doesn't work – what is not going on now, if you've been thinking about and thinking about it in advance – then a good, right and courageous decision can also be to give the animal to jmd that gets better clear.
But there can't be a speech about it. – Have fun with your horse.
I never did!
In doubt, I always had someone with much more knowledge than I will ever have!
It is not a shame to be able to learn it but already.
Many things can be influenced, but not the tension on earth that remains us and those who entrust us.
Nothing is perfect and whoever waits for the perfect solution will wait.
Don't blame me, but I have to laugh at your question. It's like someone who's freshly in love and now has panic fear to get it.
The fear of mistakes has never helped anyone.
And yes, I know the feeling. It wasn't necessarily scared with me. It was my ambition. I had extreme demands for myself as a horse owner. I had almost 20 years of riding experience. And then I had to find out: I know shit 😂🙈
Example: wanted to adjust the new bridle. Is that really cut? A hole shorter? Is that good? I had no idea
So the first thing I learned was to ask other people! Yeah, that's so easy! If you don't know, ask. And if you think it would be embarrassing: the question is completely normal! Today I belong to the people who are asked and therefore I can assure you: it is absolutely okay to ask for even the greatest pellet. Every long-term horse owner has questions too! So ask questions.
And the second thing I've learned: you don't take a horse so easily, just because you haven't found the perfect posture yet. If you realize you have to change something, try it out! Every horse owner must first look at what attitude and employment a horse needs. When I was a kid, I was in a riding school where posture was completely normal. The ponies went to the Bundeschampionate and one even to the European Championship. Horny wasn't, but the ponies survived.
Lastly, don't let you “guess” too much on the internet. Even if you are doing exactly that 😂. But on the Internet one is declared 99% to animal torture.
This is how it works:
Boxing, haylage, horseshoes, blankets, scissors, jumping, spores, even tailings instead of reading…for you come to hell. If your horse is on a tree, he'll be better. How? You don't get four times a year from the satellite? Your horse is guaranteed to be inextricably and must be redeemed.
I think THAT is the cause of your fears of failure!
Just make small goals first. First you see that you don't kill your horse for the next few days, then you try to keep it alive for a month and if it still lives after half a year, you'll be more relaxed. Promise!
One more thing: HERE's CONGRATULATIONS on your own horse and welcome to the crazy world of horse owners!
If you chose a well-designed open-stall, not just some, the horse can live without you in principle. It needs other horses, light, air, free movement on fixed soils (coppel is a nice plus of movement and depending on the colonization ponds also on pasture grass – if they are tolerating it – but first of all "the living room" must fit), it needs basic food and water. Then it has everything, even if you don't come.
There are so many horse owners where it would be better for the horses, the owner would not be there. Because every time he comes, he makes falsehood: maybe the horse is humanized and it exposes loads that don't have to be, maybe badly rides…
Therefore, so much can not be done wrong if you keep in mind, it is a horse, you get him the stable and the services. And when you ride it, you do it with the right trainer and as good as you can. You give him a clear line in handling (eg may be greased by hand and if so, what signal of man has to wait) – and it will be happier than many other horses.
In 2 months you will know more.
you have one of the horses that are more shy in a strange environment.
Oversight is as little command as carelessness.
I hope you have a good riding service and a good and comprehensive training service. you will need both.
Shy? So no, he's all, but not shy;)
I have coaches of course.
well then – cordial desire. and always go to sleep in time. if you get tired of the horse or don't dig the school.
So don't go after work? Then before work in the morning? So at night at 4:00? Or without a job?:How do I finance this? Questions about questions… but main thing
When the day has stolen me completely, Pony's observing is the best way to get my head free again. When the stress level is down again, riding is also great.
Pfft…
There's really no point in staying in the puppies if you have to be fit every day.
there is nothing to drive to the horse on the afternoon after the uni or the school or the work if one of the days has already completely leached.
What do you have for a sound? School is already a bit, for Abi it has been enough;)
Imagine there are also people who think like that. seems not to have been the case with you and this message.
So I had an apple mold in the last century – pony mare, my unforgotten Nurika, but I never had such thoughts because there was no real reason for it.
You may just be overwhelmed in my eyes, that this horse is now really yours, and it has been a long dream for you. This can be a bit confusing, even if it's a nice feeling.
But if you have a lot of experience, have closed him into your heart and he also has a fair stability, everything is good. Then you will always pay attention to him and his needs. And that's what matters.
Get to know each other alone, take your time riding, pamper him something and look forward to having such a great friend on 4 hooves. You know, if you won a horse's trust, you found a friend for life.
Have fun.
I had it too. Joy was great but I had bought a raw horse. Didn't know how to do it. Two years. I'm sorry. My horse is my eyeball my dream. I wish my horse would live even closer with me. I couldn't stand a day without a horse.
Enjoy reaching your goal 1. You have your own horse!
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As long as you take care of your horses and he doesn't give signs that he doesn't feel good, everything's okay. Sorry can't give you a better answer. Don't know me with horses.
I'd like to help.