Borderline and getting to know each other phase?
I have a question for those who know about borderline personality disorder. My friend wrote to me today saying that he doesn't have feelings for anyone and hates people… (It said something like "Because of bzh, I'll be honest, I don't have feelings for anyone, you're all screwing me over" … I don't know if he wrote it because he's not feeling well, because he hasn't written in the last few days (but he did tell me it was because of borderline personality disorder). Three days ago he was being really sweet to me, showing me feelings and so on… and then suddenly something like this…. I don't know what to make of it… should I take it personally? Should I wait until he's feeling better?
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It is typical for Borderliner between devaluation and idealize constantly changing. Depending on the feeling of the Borderliner, it decides in which phase it is located and depending on whether you trigger the person. A relationship with a Borderliner is therefore demanding and requires a lot of patience.
If bro isn’t mental stable, I would support him to improve, so he is also capable of relationship
I tried but he’s never available… I wrote it, “I still think it’s good that you’re honest, I’m sorry that you’re so shit… I would really like to help you get out of it… I hope you’re okay? Idk, if that’s a pass between us now, and we kind of don’t have time or something, but do I know I’m here for you? I just didn’t know what’s going on, but still good you’re telling me. If there’s a kind of white one where I can help you, say yes?”
You give him the support he needs. Super 🙂
The only thing that helps is a therapy, otherwise you can’t help someone like that.
I wouldn’t say soon. There are many crappy drugs that serve to stabilize such patients. Likewise, a psychiatric institution, as well as a change, the way of life, would be a further aid building.
No, don’t take that personally. Borderliners often have strong mood swings. Today everything is great, tomorrow the world is doof.
It can also be within a few hours.
As it sounds, he seems to be in a rather unstable phase. You have to be careful and take care not to hurt you.
If you notice that you don’t do well then take your time.
Just wait. You can offer him that you’re there if he wants to get his hands off. (If you trust that) Otherwise, leave it first.
I asked him a few days ago if he wanted to meet again… he didn’t answer first, and then there was a text like this:
“I don’t know the ding is 🤐komm at moment currently not clear I’m really in the hospital yesterday. house so and bhz I tell you honestly I feel straight ganrnix I have no feelings for no one her fucks me all up I hate people man digga why don’t you understand that I can’t take out without pills because I otherwise get panic attack I can’t get that anymore man fuck no”
I wrote it thereupon:
“I still think it’s good that you’re honest, I’m sorry that you’re so sacked… I would really like to help you get out of it… I hope you’re okay? Idk, if that’s a pass between us now, and we kind of don’t have time or something, but do I know I’m here for you? I just didn’t know what’s going on, but still good you’re telling me. If there is a way I can help you, say yes?”
it has already hurt to read what he wrote…. But idk what to do 🥹 I know I should wait, but I’m afraid he meant all he wrote seriously …
Wait.
That really sounds like he’s not going well at all.
But you can’t help him. He needs professional help.
You can encourage him to help. Maybe even go directly stationary. You can visit him there.