As a father, training or normal work with school?
Hi, so here's my situation: I'm 24 and went straight to work after school, so I don't have any training (unfortunately. It was stupidity and personal reasons that led me not to start any training back then, but it would take too long to explain that now).
My wife had a child this year and that gave me the motivation to start again (I wanted to do it anyway, but didn't dare to do it afterwards because I thought I was too old).
I would actually like to pursue an academic career (librarian or teacher). I know that the goal is very high and my spelling is not perfect yet (I will catch up on that), but that would still be my main goal at the moment.
Since I only have a secondary school diploma due to laziness and a lot of stress at school, I thought I would do an apprenticeship, complete the 3.5 (plumber) and get a secondary school diploma through vocational school, then get my A-levels through night school and then go on to study (if I manage that. If the cost is too high, I could then become a bookseller with the diploma, so I could retrain or something like that).
Now my wife just announced she's pregnant again… so we're having our second child, and paying for an apprenticeship is going to be really tight when I have to support myself, two kids, and my wife. Sure, the job center supports me, but that's not exactly the best thing, is it?
Would it perhaps be better if I started working regularly and received a full salary, while simultaneously completing secondary school and high school diplomas through distance learning or evening classes, so I could then go on to university or do the proper training I want? On the other hand, I'd be almost 30 by then, and going back to vocational school would be tough, but since I have 31 degrees of scoliosis, I couldn't work in a trade for the rest of my life anyway and would inevitably have to retrain, even with a plumbing apprenticeship.
I want to be a good role model for my children, not just in my private life but also in my professional life, so that they see that training or a good education is worth it and that you should persevere even if things don't go smoothly or that you should still persevere even if you are older and no longer fit the norm.
What do you advise me? What would you do in my situation?
I am grateful for any help and advice.
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Both children first register directly at the kindergarten if they are not already. It takes years to get a place – if ever. Otherwise one of you must stay at home until the children both go to school and that would not be financially responsible for the yellow of the egg.
If I get that right, do you have a primary school degree? Then I would definitely advise you to continue school. Maybe dual? So at the same time school and work.
What about your wife? Does she have to go to work and support you or should you do all this alone? Unfortunately, it's hardly possible nowadays, because everything is so expensive.
Accepting assistance from the Office is also not a shame. Of course, you can go to work and still apply for additional help for you. That's what the office is for.
The one is already logged in to the kindergarten, that can then go there in 2 1/2 years that others have not yet been told, since we were told that child must be born first before you can register.
So you mean doing the training where you go to school and work by the way, or do you think you're going to work right and by the way to school to get the degrees for a better job? And I'm sorry, I've only got a major school degree, at least.
My wife will work part-time later if the child, or now the children are in kindergarten. She's an animal nurse, so she doesn't get that much money. So most of them will hang on me.
Whether you're doing an education with school or working normally and doing the school next door is of course left to you. Take a look at the possibilities you have in your area and get involved in different places
Unfortunately, I have only received a commitment there so badly :/
And could not another training be considered? So instead of plumbing a training in an area that requires less physical?
I already have a commitment from the plumber company that knows me privately. There would be a salary, but only at 600 euros, as it is an education. Advantage is that I can make my real school graduation there, of course, that I would have two flying with a flap, after which I could still make Abi. The disadvantage is that I would probably need a retraining later, because my scoliosis actually does not belong to the craft and that could naturally deteriorate. And, of course, I don't want to go to early retirement and later I can't even smoke on my old days.
The advantage of the normal work is that you get more money than n apprentices and you at least earn normal. So I could do the school next door and pick up the graduations. The disadvantage is that I have to do a training or study later with almost 30.
What would you do in my situation? Or what do you advise me for?
It's good to make plans and set goals. But with plans this is one thing – there is still life in between, and our plans are confronted with the reality of everyday life.
You have a full-time job, soon the responsibility for two children, a woman and scoliosis, which will not get better with the years. Now, you're dreaming of catching up with your Abitur and maybe studying. This is certainly not impossible, but very ambitious. Maybe, in your personal situation, too ambitious.
I suppose you've been working for a few years. I do not know in what area, but if there is an appropriate training profession, then there are also opportunities to get a job without training if you have appropriate professional experience. That would be clear, in time and in time. The chambers support here and also offer corresponding, secondary courses. This would be the most logical way for me to have a degree first. And it would be easy to finance. You always have to have that on the screen.
If you have a professional qualification, you can reconsider how to shape your further professional future. Always one step after another should be your motto here.
Just don't get anything from your plans.
If your main goal is to study, then I wouldn't do a lesson.This will go forever.Whatever you do, the woman must play completely and the relationship must be on solid feet.Son the stress will break you.
Option 1: you both go to work half-day and you're doing the evening school next door.
Option 2: you work full time and do school by the way, but you don't have time at home for family.
Option3: Social benefits and school, but is really close to finance
As you decide, I would depend on what is best to organize.Can your wife possibly work at home? How flexible is your employer.How much energy do you have to bring everything up?
I don't think much about distance learning unless you're highly motivated.Because it's expensive and I know someone who don't end it.
I see the training as superfluous. Why do you need a training if you can directly retrieve real school degrees and Abitur? I would only do training if you also trusted you to work there for several years
Hi.
I'd advise you on training. At least that's how you have something in your hand that you can take back. The way to Abitur is still long and only because one is once enrolled in a study does not mean that one also successfully ends it.
In summary, the situation was from the beginning the opposite of optimal: the lowest school degree, a severe chronic disease. Then this year the situation became even more tricky: the first child. Then the highest dreams came: an academic profession.
So far I would have said: do x and y, and then you have a chance not to reach your dreams completely, but at least get close.
But in this situation, which was already difficult anyway, you had nothing more important to do than to ensure that it is not getting worse at least, but no: the second child. Whatever you're doing on any advice, how do you know your wife won't have the third child during this? Then the fourth? The fifth?
If you replace “dumbness” with “Hang to make decisions so that it will definitely become even more difficult” you will notice that nothing has changed since “at that time”.
Dispel the second child, and if it is too late to accept the jobs that are to be stopped in the situation. For as I said, it is not a matter of not theoretically making everything possible; it is about the fact that many decisions have to be taken correctly on the way, and that has not worked well in the lighter situation so far.
What's that stupid advice to let the child go? You don't know the backgrounds, and you suggest that he makes bad decisions? You know why he made a decision? If not, you should thoroughly consider whether you need to give your must next time or not. Because you weren't a big help now.
Thank you Captain Obvious. “You don't know the backgrounds,” of course I don't know them. Just like no one else here and that's why, like any other, I'm going from what he offers to information. In himself he has the knowledge that he has broken the soup himself, even himself. Quintessence of my answer was just that he is on the best way to make the soup even more pale than it is already, and that it might be quite good not to do that.
And otherwise the question was what I would do, and I answered that and I will still be allowed to do that, right?
Stay open to other possibilities.
What you're doing sounds really hard. With two children, so much unplanned can come in between that you do not cling too much to these plans.
First of all, I think a solid education is a good idea.
Something can be built on that. According to his teaching, an acquaintance of me has found a really well-paid job only in production, later in the same company in the office.
It is also possible to become teachers at a vocational school under certain circumstances.
It's just important that you keep training and complete it.
As it goes on, it usually comes from itself.
Full-time work plus secondary school plus after graduation. I think you're making the extra load a little too easy. By the way, you also have 2 children you want to be there for.
What makes your wife professional? And what are your professional plans in general? The fact that you have to take all of them over the rounds is a relatively old, dusty family image, which is no longer absolutely feasible in today's time.
Have you changed your mind? What are their expectations and what are yours?
I think it's hard to imagine, but I think you can do it if you really kneel in there and stay on the ball.
My wife is an animal nurse who will only go back to work when the children are in the children's hardship and then probably part-time. So most of them will hang on me.
My wife supports me, she has no special expectations. Of course, it would only be important to you that I have something firm and can do it.
I could do the training as a plumber, then re-learning at the vocational school and then earning Abi in an evening school and at the same time as a journeyman. This thing is just that I have scoliosis, so or so I need some retraining because I can't work with my back forever.
That's why my concerns, if it weren't better to work normally first and earn halfway full money than implicitly and by the way to school, then immediately make an education (or with luck if my can/intelligence suffices a study) that I can also do from my back and where I also want to make.