Child on a leash?
Hello! The situation is this: I was out in town yesterday and saw a woman with her child on a leash. Not around the neck or attached to a harness, but attached to a backpack. The child was maybe four years old or so and was wearing a light blue backpack. Attached to the back of the backpack was a leash about two meters long. At one point, I saw the child wrap the leash around the father's legs. The mother then pulled the child back by the leash. My questions: What do you think about this? Is this even allowed? Personally, I think it seems a bit impersonal. If the mother holds the child on a leash instead of holding her hand, the child will never learn how protective that can be. I look forward to your answers!
LG
Naturequeen
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It's definitely allowed. Opinions are divided, and I'm genuinely surprised by how positive or neutral everyone's responses have been. There are definitely other ways to do this.
There's no "right" or "wrong" here. You have to consider the entire situation and the individual child.
Firstly, holding hands isn't ideal for children in terms of posture. They have to keep their arms raised the entire time, which can be uncomfortable. This also leads to a less secure gait, as they adjust to their parents' needs (stride length, pace, etc.) and the security of sharing their balance. Or even being pulled up in the event of a fall (which can cause even more injuries, such as a dislocated arm, than the fall itself).
Then there are many children who don't WANT to hold a hand. Children fundamentally strive to become independent. They want to make their own decisions and be mobile, exploring their world. Therefore, many children will actually rebel against holding a hand.
At the same time, of course, this "desire for freedom" is the reason why parents need to supervise and restrain their children. After all, they can't yet foresee what will happen if they run out into the street.
A leash CAN be a compromise. It allows the child more freedom of movement without actually allowing them to run away. It's definitely useful in certain settings (eg, crowds; I also like the beach example, or I've experienced it while shopping).
At the same time, however, you have to be aware that a leash still requires your full attention. Two meters is enough to run into a street. A leash can pose further obstacles if it gets knotted. As you describe yourself, wrapping it around someone else's legs. It's still not a free pass.
There may also be reasons on the part of the parents that make a leash more advisable. For example, herniated discs make it difficult to bend down to reach the child, or a crooked position that makes holding the child's hand painful.
This means you have to weigh it up individually. And for some children, a leash suits their needs better than physical contact.
I saw it on vacation at the seaside and found it quite useful in that situation. When a wave hits, a small child can quickly sink, panic, and get into danger. The leash allowed the father to pull the child out at any time.
In the city, the situation is completely different. On the one hand, the danger is reduced because the child can't run away or fall unnoticed into the street. This can make it easier for the mother to maintain control. On the other hand, something can still happen, and you might not be as attentive because you're "relying" on the leash. The child might also get the impression of being "on their own."
Hard to say… Personally, I don't think I would do it.
Well, I know what it's like to put a child on a leash because it only walks/crawls from A to B but never goes where it's supposed to go… but for me, that wouldn't really be an option. Honestly, I find it a bit derogatory to put a person on a leash… I saw it happen several times in England two years ago, and the children didn't seem to have a problem with it… but I still think it's morally wrong.
This is completely normal and has always been the case. This way the child is protected and does not run into open streets
Sometimes that can be a good thing. Especially in the city, children tend to run away very quickly. And this is a good way to prevent that. Furthermore, holding hands is very uncomfortable for both parents and children. It's a very unhealthy posture for both.
Of course, you shouldn't tug on the leash, except in an emergency. Otherwise, you can call or fetch children as usual. But if the child suddenly runs off, the leash gives you control to make sure the child doesn't run into anything or disappear.
I think this is a good solution because children often disappear very quickly. A leash simply makes children safer in the city.
Because it is attached to the backpack, the child is not hurt and in an emergency the child can take the backpack off.
Of course, you shouldn't pull on the leash, but children also do a lot of nonsense that can be dangerous.
I think it's actually quite practical for children who just break free and run into the street
I remember that from back in the day. There was a walking harness specifically for small children.
Amazon still sells baby walker belts. Ours back then were similar.
It depends. A leash can be better than tugging on the arm, which I always find horrible when parents do that. Especially since the angle is usually awkward and painful for the child.
Security is more important than "associations" like "that seems so impersonal."
I remember it from back then when it was common practice and I always found the idea very practical and nobody got upset about it.
Hello
You don't know the story. Maybe it's hard to control.
Ours wanted to be kept on a leash several times (like a dog), so you do her the favor
LG
I know there's such a thing, similar to a harness. I think it's a leftover from another era. It seems very strange to me, too. If the children are 18 months old and you have twins, then I can still understand it. A four-year-old child can actually walk holding your hand and already understands a lot. I can empathize with your dismay.
I am 26 and have to be leashed regularly because I have ADHD and autism. I just run away, forget that I should stay close and can't assess dangers.
I've seen some videos of a child on a leash. The child had autism. For some parents, it can be very helpful.
It can be quite helpful in many situations. And I prefer parents to tie their children up rather than letting them grab everything and everyone.
It is not forbidden.
But your personal opinion doesn't matter. It's not your child, and you know absolutely nothing about that child, and you don't know what led to the decision to use such a leash.
Thanks for the reply!
I find it quite strange to have a child on a long leash, like a dog…
However, I'm quite tall and might have difficulty holding a very small child, who's just learned to walk, by the hand for extended periods (on the street). So I'm always wondering if there's a good idea for some kind of 'arm extension'…
That could well be the case…with very active children, they'll be under the car before you know it!
I experienced this and thank God the child is still alive
and me too!
Sorry, I thought I was going to die…of fear!